You’re Officially

We’re honored to present you an award for being an amazing

High five for being such a tremendously awesome individual. You do everything better than everyone else. Period. No one else comes close to being as awesome as you are at being a . In fact, you’re so impressive and amazing at what you do, they’re going to change the name of your profession to -ery or something like that.

Thousands Under Ninety Official Award Recipient

, Winner at Life

Jessica Hische, Great Judge of Character

Want a copy of this certificate? Take a screen shot. Don’t know how to take a screen shot? Now you know. I hope your mind is appropriately blown by your new screen-shotting abilities.